The Sociopathic Liar – Beware of this Dangerous Sociopath

The one behavior that characterizes the human race is so widespread that most of the time we don’t even notice it. It is extremely hard to spot and it is even harder to stop. It is lying.

Most people have lied in their life. Whether it was to protect feelings, avoid trouble, impress, or to simply get what they want, not many people can say they have never told a lie.

However, there is one extreme type of liar that you should beware of; the sociopathic liar.

On first impressions, you may find you actually like or are drawn to the sociopath. It’s not surprising as more often than not they are indeed charming and likable. Watch out, these type of liars can cause untold damage and mayhem once they lead you into their web of lies and deceit.

Sociopaths lie the most because they are incapable of feelings and do not want to understand the impact of their lies. They may even get a thrill out of lying at your expense. Once they tell an initial lie they go on to tell many more lies in an attempt to cover up the lies they started, or just for the “fun” of it.

A sociopath rarely reveals his or her feelings or emotions. You won’t often hear them laugh, cry, or get angry. These kinds of liars tend to live in their own little world and always find ways to justify their dishonest deeds. They do not respect others and place their own needs first and foremost.

If someone questions the sociopath’s lies they can be incredibly devious in the way they cover things up. This can include placing the blame at someone else’s door or by inventing complex stories to cover up their untruths.

Sociopaths can be so good at lying that they are able to pass lie detector tests. This means they often escape jail or don’t even get prosecuted for the crimes they permit. (That’s not to say all sociopathic liars are criminals, of course).

It is believed by some experts that sociopathic lying is connected to the mental illnesses Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD).

If you come across someone who you think is a sociopathic liar, beware!

3 thoughts on “The Sociopathic Liar – Beware of this Dangerous Sociopath

  1. Indeed, sociopathic compulsive liars are on the more severe end of the spectrum. I’d agree there’s a strong narcissistic element, and also often a sadistic enjoyment in deceiving others. As a therapist I work with compulsive liars regularly who genuinely seek help. The compulsive liar who tell you that they are lying is already, at that point, on the road to recovery. But the sociopath may have a different agenda. I find they rarely enter treatment voluntarily unless with a hidden agenda. I had an example recently where someone attended, in my view, to appease their partner who threatened to leave. They also refused to pay for the session arguing that they never formally agreed to the fee. This is unheard of. Yet it shows an element beyond compulsive dishonesty, but one of exploitation. Hence I like your distinction between the liar who wants help, perhaps they’re in touch with shame, versus the sociopath who wants to deceive, exploit and enjoy getting one up on the other.

    • So I’ve been working with this woman for the past two years and realised very early on that she obviously had an issue with telling the truth. On first impressions she would come across as extremely charming and would seemingly go out of her way to help people but it soon became apparent that it was just a form of control and manipulation. There was no one who was exempt either. Her husband and son also worked for the same company and she used exactly the same tactics on them and manipulate to serve her own selfish needs. The worse thing was she would get you to the point of trusting and every single time, would end up abusing that trust by backstabbing and being two faced. It is amazing to witness/see – evil personified. For my own survival, once I realised she was a psycho I made it my mission to ensure I stayed at arms length and began my journey on trying to pinpoint exactly what was wrong with her. Calling her a compulsive liar didn’t describe accurately the real level of deceit and manipulation that she exhibited and then just today, I stumbled across the meaning of Sociopath which describes her down to a tee. I also firmly believe there is a touch of NPD there too. She has managed to create MASSIVE conflict out of nothing and has always manage to end up looking an innocent bystander. I pride myself of being able to see the good in all the people in my life – even those who exist beyond my choice. But her ………. evil personified. Devoid of emotion, guilt or an honest word. She lied to me once about having breast cancer!? but asked me not to mention it to her family?!! Turns out there was nothing wrong at all and she was just trying to manipulate opinion. In my life of being lucky enough to say I am surrounded by wonderful people, she is the only purveyor of evil that I know. I’m working really hard on ensuring the feeling of hate doesn’t persist in my consciousness as it doesn’t serve me well. Trying to get to the neutral stage. Problem is, I have to witness her mess with people on a daily basis. She manages a team of people who regularly complain to me about her and the fact that she makes their lives a misery. Not a lot I can do about it which bothers me.

      • I can SO RELATE!
        Unfortunately I have entered a relationship with this Person!
        He’s so manipulative! His mother told him she wouldn’t give in any more money! Since he has Invented Job interviews and Lied SO MUCH! Now his mother THINKS he Has A Job and has been giving him Money! IM DISGUSTED!
        I have caught him IN SO many Lies! I came across this website trying to find More about it an the More I Read The More I believe he Is REALLY SICK! :( he’s SICK! I myself suffer from anxiety disorder but this is LIKE NOTHING I Have ever witnessed IN MY LIFE!
        He has No Feelings! NO GUILT! And LAUGHS when He gets Results Froms his horrendous Lies! Now I just Need to Figure out how To deal with This and MOVE ON! The more I think about his deceit and how DeeP It Is the sicker I Feel!
        We haven’t been intimate in MONTHS and he says NOTHING about it! No FEELINGS! Also he is emotionally BLIND TO anyone else’s feelings around him!
        I’m sorry U have to work with this person and I can honestly say Ur Are Not alone in this Crazyness and Unfortunatley neither is Ur Co-worker! It’s horrible! GOOD Luck!

  2. I believe my sister is a patholigcal /compulsive liar. I have just found out that over the last 3 years she has spent 12,000 pound that belong to our mum. she has also spent 5,000 pound of her daughters money and pawned all her daughter jewerly. Please Help i feel so betralyed and angry/numb. She has lied even stupid little lies,I reflect back over the years and just feels nothing was real.

  3. I’d like to know more about mythomania, I believe that my boyfriend might be a compulsive liar. Of course, I didn’t say anything to him, because he would never listen to me. He tells me that at the age of 12 he beat out a 16 year old adolescent and put him in a come. Please note that he is very skinny and doesn’t practice any sport. He also believes that he needs to smoke in order to hide his bad sides, that’s his excuse to smoke. I’d really like to help him and tell him, but I know nothing about all this, so if you read this, please help me out, thanks much!

    • Sounds like you need to be very careful, Chloe! You can’t change people, people change themselves; you should be able to talk to him about anything, if you cannot, you have to consider if that is the kind of relationship you wish to commit yourself to; lying doesn’t make for a happy life!

  4. We absollutely have a sociopathic liar in our family. I thought he was a “compulsive liar” and he is but he is also the sociopath. He lies even when the truth sounds better. He picks incidents from various occassions and pieces together a ‘new’ story of an incident so it fits whatever lie he is telling. The thing that is so disturbing to me is that his father believes every lie he tells him so his father believes everyone is out to get him. He is in prison convicted by 12 and I am familiar with the case and I KNOW he’s guilty. But he is denying it and is trying for a new trial and of course his father is all for it.

  5. I believe my son is a sociopathic liar.he lies about most things ranging from little white lies to huge lies.he will look you in the face and tell you hes black when hes white(exaggerated). He is not a very liked person due to this.so many times he has had threats of violence against him.mixed with alcohol and drug intake he is a time bomb.i fear for my family’s safety as one day I know something will happen.when I confront him about things he has done he denys it and I have no proof to prove him wrong . Please help

  6. i am compulsive liar. it is a disese and i hate myself for it! it is life ruining and i would never wish it upon anyone. it hurts not only myself but the people that get dragged into it. i had not noticed my disorder properly until i had ruined my whole life. leaving myself with noone at all.

    • It isn’t a condition, it is a choice; you have admitted it, that makes you bigger, and more powerful than any lie, so just keep disabling the lies, by telling the truth.

      There is no need for you to tell someone you do not like their hair style, or clothes, or the colour of their car, or the decor of their home; if you do not like it, it doesn’t matter, you have no need to say so, as it is unimportant – we all know what kind of lies harm people.

    • If you are going to hate yourself for lying Jessie, please be sure to love yourself for admitting to it, it is easier to forgive someone when they admit it, my hope is that my parents would admit it, then I could forgive them, I so often hug them, and tell them that I love them, yet still they lie, and it is soul destroying, it makes me feel so hated by them! and I feel so accused by those who will believe them, it is so fearful!

      Don’t just hate yourself, Jessie, hate the lies, spite them, by telling the truth, and forgive yourself, laugh, sing, shout, and change, you can change! Its your choice.

      Tomorrow is a new day, Jessie, you will know how to approach it, for you have told us you hate lying.
      I your lies have caused anything that you can now correct, then do so, for the sake of others who maybe suffering, but if you do, then forgive yourself also, Jessie, and we will forgive you.

  7. I think my mother may be a sociopathic liar, I was looking up compulsive liar, thinking it may describe a certain behaviour that fits her own, but having read about the sociopathic liar, I feel it is more apt.

    It has, along with both of my parents abuse, and I have to say that dad has also been very dishonest with people, even though they call themselves christians, and will be in chapel later today, their lies and bullying, has almost led to my suicide, and my mother would stand by, and continue to lie, even if it did cost me my own life.

    They have both seen fit to deliberately lie to others, to give a false impression to anybody I may later talk to, paving the way, before I get to see them, my doctor, their ministers, the Farm Crisis Network, the police, they have lied to them all, with no thought for me, my reputation, or future, it all means nothing at all to them. She has also tried to hit me, and as children, she used to hit around the head so very, very, hard.
    They have also lied to the DWP for many years, about disability claims, I did wonder if telling those lies, have forced them to tell others, which I know it will have done, but even before any claim, as young children, mum would lie, to avoid taking responsibility for her actions, such as hitting a bus with a tractor and trailer, she just drove on, and would never admit it, even though both of us, her children, were riding on the top of the load, and told her what had happened.

    It is the lies she has told about myself over the last four years, that has destroyed my life, and she cares not one jot; lies have served her very well throughout her life, and lies are the first thing she turns to, and life is all about her needs, other people’s needs hold no value for her, unless their is public reward for being seen to be helpful, or caring.

    Abuse and violence is what awaits her family, whilst the most extreme charm is reserved for others, dad is exactly the same in that way, the most bizarre charm is reserved for others, and falling over themselves to help others, whilst he puts his own family through the most terrifying hell.
    Unfortunately, they are able to find people within their church, who like their charm, and encourage them.

    I found out a few years ago, that my sister had felt suicidal because of our childhood, and she sought counselling.
    I have asked my parents to stop lying about me, and think about what they are doing to my life, my work, my reputation, and relationships, but you just get yet another lie thrown at you for doing so, she makes up events, and false situations, and will not admit the things she has said to others, or even written, even challenged with the letters, letters she said were never written, and suggested I was making up in my mind. It is all so cruel, and all deliberate.
    I was told by my mother that they could lose the house, so I did all I could to help them, giving her many thousands, much of which was cash, as she wanted, and yet she now denies it all in front of others, she has kept no records of the money I gave her in cash.
    Mum led me to believe she had no money, and no savings, I have since found out this was not true, she has numerous savings, in ISAs, and had told me she has none at all, as she has never had any money to save – but it just wasn’t true, yet I put their needs before my own, to help them.

    I am worried that she may have implied I have been violent towards her, which just isn’t true, and as a women, she knows she will be believed, and she has very proudly told me, that “no-one will believe you,” for she knows she is the one people will believe, being a women, yet she is so deceitful, abusive, and has, at 73 years of age, only just stopped hitting me, her son, and only because I have been more outspoken about her behaviour, before, I just kept it all private from all but two of my closest friends who were going through very similar themselves.

    They have nearly cost me my life, they will be in chapel tomorrow, absorbing the encouragement from people who do not know the truth about their behaviour.

    I have been at my wits end, for just what can you do about a liar? They so often find an audience, which is exactly what they want, it boosts their bravado.

    It is shocking to know that your own parents would have stood back and let you take your own life, just to hide their own actions, but they did exactly that!

    My father tells the DWP that he can hardly walk so I have recently discovered, yet for years they have been going dancing, and have been dancing tonight – when I told my parents their hindering my work, and hindering my life, was pushing me over the edge, after asking them to help, for three years, and after writing to their Methodist minister pleading for help, who also did nothing, after telling my parents their behaviour was pushing me over the edge, my mother just snarled at me in reply, and said “people who talk about suicide, don’t do it!” walk past me, and went dancing for the evening.
    I had worked for them for nothing, to help them save the farm, I had given them more than I could afford to, to help them keep their home, and yet she has told so many lies, many of them attacking my character, and it has crushed me; she also bullies dad into lying on her behalf, and lies for him also – it is a frightening situation!

  8. My husband is a sociopathic liar.

    He has ruined his own life, mine and the life of our children. He puts his interests above everyone and everything.

    He lies when the truth will do.

    He has found himself in deep financial and probably criminal trouble. He wants us all to sacrifice for him. He’ll get off with no down side, I’ll be lumbered with another debt. There’s no remorse. And it will happen again. And again. And again.

    And yet when you put it to him that his behaviour is abhorrent, he becomes defensive and pushes it back.

    And he’s threatening to kill himself if I don’t agree to help him “undo” all his lies. Lies, upon lies, upon lies, upon lies.

    When will this ever end?

  9. There are two types of liars, those that are compulsive and those that are sociopaths. I married a sociopath. I knew he lied, he acted as if he could not help it, he even said things such as “what if I can’t quit lying” Then it escalated after his daughter got married, then his one sister died. he lies about everything big and small and pulls me in and I have been noticing he does get satisfaction when he can win me over. He told his daughter I am crazy and on drugs. I was the one who brought up giving money to her for her wedding, she is not young by the way. I did make a major mistake talking about Jehovah’s witness not knowing the new son in law was one, but it was one sentence as in people on my road should keep their doors shut due to they are coming door to door. My husband lies about money and awhile back he almost bankrupted us, I made a plan with a company who helps people in debt, it took six years to do it but we did. Now he is gambling, I found he owed $75.00 to a work friend. I have had spine surgery and did not want to go to a bar with him and his sister, he said he would not be gone long, 5 hours later and then he said the only thing he did wrong was not be realistic with telling me the time that was needed to get there and home. He went to a motel, I guess he did that thinking that was my worst fear, losing him. He lost his wedding band somewhere at the motel, he said he looked for it but not like I would have being out there in sunlight the next day, he bought a new one. He is going on a golf outing, he even told me I ok’ed it, no I did not. Then he said he already gave them the $50 deposit of the almost $500 for the 4 days and 3 nights. he told me there is a stripper club some of the guys go to but he won’t go, I shouldn’t worry. He said yesterday he would rather take care of things for himself only in foul words than touch me. I went to my Dr and I am situationally depressed, which I knew but I also wanted to make sure that the medication I need to take isn’t the problem because that is what he is telling people, that it makes me crazy. My sister had a stroke and now needs a cardiac catheterization, I am worried about her. Brett Gyllenskog asked yesterday after calling me names and screaming if I loved him because I used the past tense of love, I don’t member saying love to him! He then said if I don’t love him then what’s the point, yes it is my fault in his eyes, again. I refuse to be scared because now I know he feeds off it. He told me I was his friend and his lover and he would never go out to a bar or on a vacation without me, even insulted the guys he works with that they live near each other and go to social events together and he would never be like that, but here he is going “golfing” which is on his “bucket list” He actually used that term. That must have took at least 15 minutes of his drive home to think that one up. I could vomit in his “bucket list” He is learning to lie better, lower toned voice etc. he acts as if he has me figured out. Like with the gambling, he just didn’t tell me the amount. The bar, “I didn’t factor in the time and you are ridiculous thinking an hour when it takes that long to get to and from our house. He said he would spend a “short time” at the bar. Then I said to him “about an hour” Bar, not driving and even then I gave in due to his sister died. Oh and he used a term I had the florist put on the flowers it was something like “sister first, mother always”. He had to sound good on facebook. He throws his arm down like the king when he has to stop watching golf or football, in fact he enjoys making me wait to talk until commercials. That is easily seen. The think that made me understand that he is a sociopath was when he went back on me being his friend. That was my lightbulb moment and it hurt. Now I am in limbo, not sure what is next except like I said I have my sister to worry about and taking care of myself, I had to retire due to my spine, which reminds me, instead of saying I have a spinal cord injury which is the truth he told his daughter it was my medications that are the problem. I am not “allowed” around her by her own words because she doesn’t feel comfortable “yet” and then she skirted around the time I took getting ready and about medications. My husband was to straighten things out before this and he came home and said too many people there, on faceboook, one other person who stayed an hour. He had time to talk to them, instead he made things much worse by yes lying about me to his own daughter. He was eating wings and hanging out, facebook again, he is incapable of seeing himself for what he truly is and apparently he has told everyone in his family lies about me. I realized that because he had me convinced I talked about his daughter to a niece of his. when I brought it up she told me not to worry about it, she is sick of the gossip! So yes, it took years, I knew he lied but I didn’t know he was a sociopath until he was willing to take the one thing way I thought we had, friendship and we would enjoy vacations and going out together because friends do that. See in this clique who he claimed he did not like and would never hang around with, they are not taking their wives. It is bad, not sure what is next. I wrote him an email and was pretty civil and I was angry and crying, he is not home from work. I texted him. what is the point of being afraid. I read where the one who doesn’t care is the one who wins, well I want him to stop being a lying sociopath and I will not be called names. I was married before and he was abusive in all ways. Looks like I did it again except he is a liar, he did push me once but I flew hard into cabinets and if I would have been hurt he would have lost his job. I do not think he was concerned about my health or if I was hurt, but he has not of yet pushed or hurt me physically again. He does not want me to have an affair, he obsesses about his first wife having an affair when he was sleeping but yet they went on to have a daughter then HE had an affair after playing some strip game, not strip poker. I doubt his wife even had an affair and when I finally said so, his eyes showed, this one time, yes he lied. there is more but I am feeling angry and he will be home soon so I am going to stop. Praying for this evil to stop.

  10. I’m so glad I stumbled upon this site.my older sister has bin a dangerous liar since I can remember,our mom said that she has always bin this way,she had filed false police reports,many being rape,which was found out were lies,told people that our mom was dead,I was in prison,just absolute crazy things,and for no reason,and when I finally get my fill of it,and confront her about the lies,she goes insane,slanders me,trys to ruin my life,called child protective services on me,the police,tried to ruin my relationships with friends and family,by now,the family has washed their hands with her,nobody will have anything to do with her,so she gets new relationships often,friends,boyfriend,recently a husband,but these people don’t know her yet,so they believe her,it hurts that they actually believe her lies.

  11. In India caste system and dowry system prevails. I got married 30 years ago . It was an intercaste marriage without dowry. From day one my mother in law and has made my life hell. She would be nice and soft in front of my husband and father in law but abuse me all the time.I saw a dual personality in her a hypocrite.
    In need she would use me and lie things about me.
    Now after my father in law expired she has become very bad. She besides defaming me in the neighborhood relatives and even the fruit and vegetable vendors who deliver things at home.She lies says things beyond my imagination.
    Recently she has started doing funny things.
    The pot in which I planted a money plant, was found broken;
    the pot a horse shaped one in which my daughter had planted some seeds,she broke its front legs and told us that she was trying to scare the rat and in the process it happened,
    I replaced and bought another pot and found its one leg broken
    once a mouse was lying still on the floor when she went closer it moved a little she brought a plastic dust piker and pressed its neck and killed it was shocking to see the poor thing shake in pain
    she looks cool nobody can know what she really is
    she behaves like a sixteen year old in front my husband and any male who visits us

    i am very scared of her and am very careful in my own house i am a stranger in my own house His daughters think she is nice and r not ready to understand what she is doing

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